It’s the thought that counts

Posted on by Roger Jarman

I’ve come to a point in my life where often-times things are humming along smoothly in just about all aspects of my life. We all wear many hats, as parents, spouses, kids, siblings, bosses, employees, co-workers, customers, vendors, friends… humans…

In each of these aspects there are a range of things which happen, a range of life which transpires and completes the “picture” of our life as we perceive it. These aspects include our mental and physical health, financial health, self-care and ability to relate and create in the world around us.

For some people this matrix of life is a myriad of issues and problems stacked upon each other. For others these pieces of the puzzle come together naturally. I’ve worked for several years to align these aspects of my life. Some have been good for as long as I can remember, others I’ve had to (and continue to) work diligently every day to create a flow.

One thing I have learned, is when something is out of alignment it sticks out like a sore thumb. An easy way to bring it into place is to intentionally focus on a given item. Recently my family has gone to a single income as we take a step back to move a few steps forward.

Removing a full-time income as summer comes up and summer camp kicks in, while we’re experiencing record high gas prices and inflation, is a scary endeavor. There are a lot of reasons I can find why we should do this now, why it’s safer to hold off until the world stabilizes.

The truth is, the world is always changing, and will always be influx. What we believe, will be reality. Initially I wanted to find all the reasons why we need a second income (if you’ve ever paid for summer camp for kids, it’s like having a second mortgage!).

Instead of staying in this fear based thinking, I changed my thought on the concept. I removed the emotion from the process and went through the bills, the budget and realized there are a lot of things I can easily adjust and make this work. As a family we can adapt to a fiscally tighter space for a time, and honestly really not notice what we’re “missing”.

This is but one simplified example and the over-arching concept is powerful. Whenever and where-ever you experience lack and/or fear in life, it is an opportunity to re-evaluate the situation and change the narrative you are telling yourself.

Write down the area(s) you are struggling with and ask yourself why this is a struggle. Think about how you can change the story in your mind, what would a better outcome look like? If you need more money, what are you willing to sacrifice to achieve it? If you need more love, how much love are you willing to give?

When we change our thoughts, we change our actions. When we change our actions we change our habits. Be the change you wish to see, act it out everyday. It all starts with what you are thinking in this moment. Like it or not, the state of our lives is a direct reflection on the state of our thoughts.

Be the awesome in your own story!

What is prayer

Posted on by Roger Jarman

We are familiar with the word “prayer”, we’ve heard it thousands of times in our lives whether we are religious, spiritual, agnostic or anything in between. We have heard people around us say they will pray for this, or pray for that, for the well-being of a loved one or for the outcome of a job interview or winning lottery ticket.

Definition of prayer

 1a(1): an address (such as a petition) to God or a god in word or thought said a prayer for the success of the voyage

(2): a set order of words used in praying

b: an earnest request or wish

2: the act or practice of praying to God or a god-kneeling in prayer

3: a religious service consisting chiefly of prayers —often used in plural

4: something prayed for

5: a slight chance haven’t got a prayer

According to the above Merriam-Webster definition above it gives us a good idea what a prayer is. Or does it? What has lead us to believe our words have anything to do with the prayer we actually petition for? How does God, Source, The Divine, Energy, know what words to listen to, which prayers to say “yes” to, and which ones to say “no” to?

How does this universal wisdom listen to our words and know how to respond, when in many cases we don’t even know what we really want?

Often people as for money, lots and lots of money! “If only I had more money than everything would be just fine!” Ever heard, or said a version of this? I’m willing to bet we all have and on more than a few occasions. Money though isn’t the desire, security is and the money is simply the tool we perceive which will provide us the security we seek. These prayers go “unanswered” because we are asking for something verbally, that we really don’t care about as long as our other needs are met.

Imagine for a minute your bank account has one million dollars in it. Imagine what you would do, would you fly off to some remote island and retire? Would you buy a bigger house, pay off debts you owe, perhaps some medical bills? Would you buy a nice new car or send your kids to the best colleges? Imagine for a moment this scenario, close your eyes and imagine one million dollars in your account. What would you do? Take a few moments to visualize this.

Welcome back! Now think about what you visualized and I invite you to bring it back into focus again, this time focus on your heart and how this visualization makes you feel. Keep this feeling at the forefront of your being and experience the feeling of this visualization. If you don’t feel much, that’s ok too, this is different for everyone and perhaps trying this again later may or may not yield different results.

The words used in our “traditional” prayers are not heeded by Divinity. We ask for things often based upon immediate desire or need. Our words are riddled by thoughts of logic, fear, what we perceive in our worlds at that moment. Even when we are meditative in our prayers our conscious thoughts are rife with what we think we know. The Divine shoots right past our conscious thought and dives straight into the energy we are moving.

This energy is like a truth serum to the universe around us. There is no on/off switch we can use to turn off our energy when we are feeling fear, anxious, sad, depressed. The universe, the Divine gives us more of what we transmute in our energy base. What does this mean?

I go back to the original question; What is prayer? Prayer is the feeling we have within us when we converse with The Divine. Prayer is something we can (and often do) be in, a continuous action instead of a short burst of a request. Prayer is the feeling we give to the universe, and the universe responds in kind.

Our words can be used as a tool to create this feeling, as can music, laughter, lighting candles and myriad other actions we may consider as “prayer”. These things though are not the prayer itself, but the tools we can utilize to create the feeling, which is ultimately the prayer.

There are no right or wrong ways to pray and if you have certain rituals or practices which create strong feelings within you I’d love to hear about them as I’m always curious as to how people individually perform this sacred ritual or prayer. I often pray, that is to say I create a feeling of love and open-ness in my heart which feels as if my heart is “on”. I no longer associate requests or words to my prayers as I let my energy speak and what the universe delivers will be exactly what it should be.

I invite you to keep this concept in mind the next time you pray, or choose to speak with you Divinity. Practice with it, play around with it, and have fun while you explore. Indeed, it’s why we’re here in the first place!